Friday, March 23, 2012

5 years.

5 years ago today was a pretty big day for the Mr and I.

5 years. It doesn't sound like a very long time, and in so many ways it hasn't felt that long. But as I looked at the pictures from our big day I couldn't help but think about all that has happened since they were taken. Then I thought.. There's no way all of this happened in just 5 years!

But it has. And in 50 years I will look at those pictures again, think about all we've accomplished and my head will probably explode just thinking about the sheer awesomeness that will be our life together.


Monday, May 23, 2011


dear body,
last friday was not our favorite. remember..

..signing our life away?
..the IV?
..the stylish allergy bracelet we wore to keep
that yucky medicine away?
..the new yucky medecine that
made us feel sick anyway?
let's not do it again, ok? thanks!


ps. good news from the dr.. everything came back a-ok!

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Operation: Rescue Domo.


It is with a heavy heart that I regret to inform you that this morning I was made aware of the fact that there are certain members of Domo's newly adopted family who are not happy with the report that they have changed their brutish ways. Shortly after this was brought to my attention I, again, started receiving photographic evidence of their feelings.

The following pictures are graphic in nature, and are not appropriate for children under the age of 2.


I am sickened to think that it is my words that have spurred these certain family members to revert to the torture and abuse of an innocent LBM. They have made false accusations, and feel that these lies justify their actions. And what's worse is that they are forcing other helpless toys to participate in these heinous crimes.

I have it on good authority that this particular family member can be especially cruel to those they consider "lesser". (Specifically, younger brothers.) Therefore, seeing how Domo is a defenseless creature, it is safe to assume that this injustice will not stop without intervention.

So, my dear readers, I must ask a favor of you. If you know of anyone who will be in or around the Idaho Falls area soon.. please.. save an innocent LBM.. save my Domo!

Thank you.

Monday, March 21, 2011

The story of LBM, Domo, and Domo 2D.

Once upon a time the Mister worked at a call center. He and his co-workers had LBM (Little Brown Monster). LBM would travel from cubical to cubical. Whenever LBM would grace the Mister's cubical with his presence I would receive pictures like these.

Oh, how I wanted a LBM of my own. Who wouldn't?
Then, during one magical night spent at Golfland this happened.

Right now you're probably asking yourself, "This is all fine and good, but what does it have to do with LBM?" Well, would you believe me if I told you that when we went to buy prizes with our tickets there was a wall-full of LBM's? It's true. Ok, maybe not a wall-full, but there were LBM's that needed a home. And one of them came home with me that fateful night.

I felt that LBM was a little impersonal for a name. Therefore, we named our LBM Domo. (The name may or may not have been on his tag. There'd be no way of knowing.)

Shortly after we brought Domo home we took him on his first road trip. (He had a new cousin in Idaho that we just had to meet.) Naturally, being the doting parents that we are, we had to take amillionbagillion pictures to document Domo's first trip.

Here he is all ready to go.
Can't you just see the excitement in his cute little face?
This is the first time he saw snow.
Again, he's so excited.
Here he is all tucked in at our hotel in SLC.
He was too excited to sleep.
Helping me crochet in the car.
He's just an excited boy, ok?
This is one of his first moments in Idaho.
Once again, so excited!

When we finally reached the Brother-in-law and Sister-in-law-in-law's house we partied like it was 2011.. McDowell-style! How does one party like it's 2011.. McDowell-style, you ask? Well, it's hard to put in words, so I'll just show you.

It requires lots of yummy food.. like this.
It involves crazy-awesome activities.
Like playing in the snow.
Why yes! I did make those amazing hats.
Cute little baby-faces like this are a must!
Which is always my favorite part of a McD party.
And lots and lots of fun with cousins.
This is Blank. Trying to make Domo's excited face.
In case you couldn't tell.

We were so sad when it was time to leave. (Rumor has it that plans for another trip may already be in the making.) In the all the commotion of packing the cars, saying good-byes, and trying to get on our way before a snowstorm Domo may have hidden from us. We were already on the road before we noticed his absence. I know, I know, this is probably one of the reasons we don't have a real child yet. And to make matters worse, we didn't even turn around to get him. We figured he'd be loved by his newly adopted family until we saw them again. Obviously we were mistaken.

Before we knew it, we started receiving disturbing pictures. Pictures that often included threats, and ransom notes. These next pictures are pretty graphic in nature.. you may want to close your eyes while scrolling down. Consider yourself warned.

It was about 10 degrees outside when this picture was taken.
Who knows how long he was left out there!
This picture was sent with a ransom note.
"I need $2 in small unmarked bills,
or the WD-40 gets lit."

Seeing how we weren't able to respond to the ransom note until the next day, we figured it was too late for Domo. So, we did what any parent would do. We went back to Golfland, and won us another LBM! Yes, I am aware that this may be yet another reason we don't have a human child. But, what's done is done, and we have named our new LBM Domo 2D.

He was so excited to come home with us!

Note: After bringing Domo 2D home, it was confirmed that Domo was still alive and well. And I am happy to announce that his newly adopted family has changed their ways, and they are now treating him very well. They even made him a special St. Patrick's Day lunch.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Check the forecast! (You-Know-Where) must have frozen over.

Growing up every child in my family was required to do chores. There were the weekly Saturday chores such as vacuuming, sweeping, dusting, cleaning a bathroom, collecting all the garbage, etc., etc., etc. Most of these chores would rotate from child to child in order to keep things fair. You know. Because being the only girl in a household overflowing with boys things were rarely fair; so why not make the chores fair? Right?

Then there were the days we would be expected to do yard work. Oh, how I loathed these days! Unlike our weekly chores, the yard work chores did not rotate. My job was always  either pulling weeds, or raking leaves. (Just fyi. These chores combined with cold, wet weather equals.. not fun.) The Brothers would always get the jobs requiring the exciting tools. (Fair, Right? I rest my case.) As long as any one of The Brothers was around I would never get my hands on a cool tool. The only thing a little bit related to a tool I was able to use as a child was a rake.. sometimes a small hand shovel, and these do not fall in the cool-tool category.

When I found out that The Mom would be spending a good portion of her day doing yard work I figured I could stop by and help out. Shocking, I know! But I was bored, and am currently on a shopping hiatus. So, what's a girl to do? Seriously, any suggestions?

Even though I wasn't expecting much, it ended up being the most eventful day I have ever spent in a yard. Of course I spent some quality time with my old companion Madam Rake, but because my parents home is officially devoid of all The Brothers I was finally able to make some new friends too! Mr. Hedge-Trimmer and I briefly became acquainted. Mrs. Leaf-Blower-Turned-Vacuum and I spent quite some time getting to know one another. At one point we even sucked up a bee. That was a little scary, I'm not going to lie.

All in all, it was a grand day. One, that throughout all those wet days spent in a yard on 13th Place, I never dreamed would happen. One, during which I continually glanced up at the sky, because I was sure I would see a pig fly.

Note: The Brothers would try to argue that, being the only girl in said household, I wouldn't know the meaning of un-fair. I would like them to think back on all of the TV shows we watched.. that's right boys! I didn't even know what a chick-flick was until I was in high school.

Also, I'm still not interested in getting to know Sir. Weed-Whacker. He just sounds mean, even from a distance. Is that wrong?

Thursday, February 03, 2011

C.O.L.D. or W.E.A.K.

Me and the Dog on a walk.
A very cold walk.

December of 2005 found me living in Provo, Utah experiencing the coldest winter of my life. Most of the previous 19 winters had been spent in Washington; which would provide 1 or 2 days of snow. For the most part my winters, up to that point, had just been wet so 1 to 2 months of snow was an entirely new thing for me. Therefore, the winter of 2005 was referred to as "The Coldest Winter Known to Amy" from that winter forth.

During "The Coldest Winter Known to Amy" I came to Arizona to visit the family for Christmas. Our first Christmas in Arizona, mind you. I came home to find the entire family wrapped in blankets, wearing robes, long sleeves, and slippers. I would constantly hear them talk about how "freeeeezing" they were.

It was 76 degrees on Christmas day. I was convinced that spring had come early, and that my family had lost their marbles.

70 degree weather in December?
Come ON people!

Fast forward 5 years, and December of 2010 found me living in Chandler, Arizona. Ah! 60-70 degree weather. Sunshine every day. Does it get better than this? I submit that it can not! ( that movie..) I must admit there were times (on the more brisk days) when I would wear a jacket, and maybe a scarf. And I would feel ashamed. But when it's 110-118 degrees during the summer 60-70 degrees can feel pretty. dang. cold. 

I know the rest of the nation is currently experiencing "Snow-pocalypse", and that our 20-30 degree weather (plus SUPER crazy wind) seems pretty insignificant. Especially when compared to the temperatures dropping below 0, and the feet and feet of snow that most of the US is dealing with. But the last 3 days have been the coldest. Ever. Did I mention that the wind situation down here has been out of control? Seriously. Out. Of. Control.

So I have decided to make it official. Tuesday, February 1, 2011 to Thursday, February 3, 2011 will forever be know as "The Coldest 3 Days Known to Amy". That's right 20 degree weather and snow of 2005.. step aside.. and make room for the 20-30 degree weather plus wind of 2011.

I must be getting weak in my old age.

Note: No animals were harmed during the making of this post. The Dog has thoroughly enjoyed "The Coldest 3 Days Known to Amy". Especially during the times she has been allowed outside.

"The Coldest 3 Days Known to Amy" is subject to change. Continuous cold weather may result in additional days to said title. 

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Tears in the night.

The other night I climbed into bed and snuggled next to a sleeping form of the Mister. (my favorite way to fall asleep.) As I was finishing my journey to dreamland the Mister's not-so-snuggly elbow decided it didn't want me next to it anymore and jerked itself into my ribs.

For me, a self-diagnosed narcoleptic, the time between consciousness and sleep is usually a very short, very intense period where my mind is rapidly becoming completely oblivious to the world. To be disrupted during this transition can be very disconcerting.

Which is why I began to cry.

I couldn't help it. I didn't want to cry, but I couldn't stop. My mind was lost in the abyss between reality and dreamland, and I couldn't get it to come back. So, I rolled over and silently cried myself back to sleep.

The next morning I told the mister about the actions of his not-so-snugly elbow, and how I couldn't control my emotions because my mind was stuck.

He laughed.
And I couldn't help but laugh too.